I ask that you forgive me because I’ve been all over the place with my emotions and so I haven’t been writing as much. However, I have been sharing my videos on this blog and I hope you get to see them on YouTube (Svrbrownsuga) or on my Nicole Cherise fb page.
I consider myself a person who is empathetic. I know I wear my heart on my sleeve, you can see the hurt and pain in my eyes and my face, yep that’s me. These past few weeks, I’ve been thinking a lot about my Daddy in particular. As a person with older parents, I’ve always said that I was sad deep down because my parents weren’t as young as my friend’s parents and the chances of them passing when I was young was a high percentage (in my head as a child). I also was very blessed as well because they provided me with so much and have the example of how I want to support my son. My mothers birthday was February 17th, and this is the first without him. At work, I still imagine seeing him come visit me, running into him in the hallway or him calling me to say hey you want a cup of tea? It will be 7 months soon, but it feels like an eternity.
Then I have a friend from high school who gave birth to a beautiful son in December. He was born with CHD(congenital heart defect) and is a true warrior. Even though it’s been years since I’ve seen her, my heart aches for her and her husband. During the time when I had Jr, we were in the comfort of our home bonding, yet they have been so supportive of the hospital with him as he fights every day. I ask that you all Pray for Baby Bryce (I love that name) who needs a new heart. There is a fb page in case you would like to follow his journey and spread awareness: https://www.facebook.com/TeamBryceHeartStrong/
Then, while spending time with my best friend Mayra, I’ve felt the pain of my Goddaughter missing while I am visiting. Mayra is so strong and is truly doing her best. I’m doing my best to be strong for her as well, but I’m saddened by the hurt behind her smile and what I see in her eyes. She’s strong for her son, my Godson. I love her.
So friends, these are few of the reasons why I’ve been in a funk lately. I told my husband earlier this week that I wasn’t in a good place and he told me to “do what it takes to get there”. Hmm, he sounds like me lol! He also told me to start with counting my blessings. I completely agree with him and that’s the best advice he could have given me. When I counted my blessings, I started to feel better.
Please be patient with me, I’ll get back to myself at some point. Thanks for supporting me!
2 thoughts on “I’ve been feeling it”
Wow hun, I can’t imagine going through those experiences right now. You even being able to come online to inspire and encourage others is amazing and now I appreciate you even more. Your husband is right – you have to do what it takes to get there but just know that it starts with God first. Counting your blessings is a beautiful idea. We are always here if you need to vent through video or text.
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Thanks so much my new Chicago friend! Yes it’s only because of my relationship with God that I am not in a dark place. We all need support and I’m happy to have people like you there for me. God bless you!
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