Category: People

Create your Own Story

Hi friends!

I know it’s been a while since I’ve blogged, but please know that I have missed being present and your presence!

One of the last videos that I did was in reference to our Story not being finished yet and that it’s only a chapter. To piggyback off of that, we NEED to focus on creating our OWN Story.

In Romantic relationships, many of us watch romantic movies or hear love songs and we think about wanting that happily ever after. We view our family dynamics, judge our friends’ relationships and are eager for all those great experiences to become ours.

We are taught during High school to attend college for a better future and then feel defeated when life doesn’t play out that way. So much pressure of what “success” is suppose to look like in our lives doesn’t always equal how we are living.

We need to create our Own love stories and our Own Success stories. What worked for some may not work for you. Be patient, go at your own pace. The work that you put into a relationship or your work is what the universe will bring back out. Find Peace and Happiness within yourselves and go from there.

I hope this post helps and I hope we all can have peace and happiness in our own personal journeys. Thanks for reading!

Nicole Cherise ♥️

The Basics.. Respect

Hi Friends! Happy NYE!!!!!

We are this close to saying goodbye to 2018 and hello to 2019! I pray that you all have a safe evening and your new year kicks off to a good start.

Respect. We all chat about it and need to have it. Many have the philosophy that respect should be given while others believe that respect is earned. I believe it’s both.

As a fellow Human being I believe we should respect each other. Meaning, I should respect your space, family dynamics, culture, physical capabilities etc. Our society has gotten to a place where people can’t be themselves without someone being out of order. Many people have a target on their back just for “looking” different or being different from the marginal lines and it really sucks. So in order for you to respect me, I need to respect you as well.

On the contrary, I do believe respecting someone as an individual is to be Earned. How is this different from respecting a person as a human being? When we respect someone as a human being, that’s the outer surface. To respect someone as an individual, We have to find out about their inner surface such as their character and demeanor. Regardless of what position this person holds in our lives, it could be Family, Friends, coworkers, bosses, religious leaders and even political leaders. We view their actions, are they trustworthy? Honest? Compassionate? Or are they mean-spirited? Uncommitted? Liars? These are just few ways Respect is Earned or not Earned.

One of my hopes for the new year is that we can do better as a whole and of course individually. Let us plant these seeds for our youth so that they can be Better than Us.

Thank you for reading!

Nicole Cherise ♥️

Gratefulness…

Hey beautiful people,

You ever looked back over past situations and thought about how thankful you were because of the outcome? The hard times you experienced and how Far you have truly come and what You’ve become? I do too.

Quite often, especially when I’m in midst of the storm (as mentioned in my last post), I try to keep things in perspective and know that there is good present. Our cognitive thoughts has a big effect on us and with little reminders that our Story isn’t over yet can be helpful.

This is one reason, I’m able to still find some joy and happiness despite battling MS, and grieving for my loved ones. I know that with my faith, I’m not alone. I know that I’m not taking the Brunt of the Battle. I’m human, you’re human, we have to take it one day at a time.

I hope this helps someone today. I know what you are currently experiencing is tough but you’re tougher. It could seem like you will never find happiness but with finding Peace, happiness can follow. You have a meaning regardless of what you’ve heard. Please, hold on.

Thank you for reading!

Nicole Cherise ♥️

Reflecting through the struggle.

Hi friends!

I hope everyone had a wonderful thanksgiving. During this time, many of us spend time with our family and friends. We take the time out to let people know how much we care and how important they are to us. Also, we get some good Eats during this holiday as well lol.

On yesterday, I stayed home to rest because my Left leg has been bothering me a lot. Two of the symptoms that I endure while battling MS is weakness and nerve pain in my arms and legs. During this time of rest, I kept thinking of: what am I fighting for?

I’m fighting for my family, friends and Myself. I made a promise that no matter how hard this battle gets, that I wouldn’t give up. Even now, as I’m currently dragging my left foot around, I still have to be present for my son on my day off. On the inside, I’m screaming but on the outside I have to hold the shield of armor for strength. My son needs to understand that life isn’t fair but you Must continue on. I need my husband to understand that his life partner isn’t a quitter. The rest of my family and friends need to know that I may be delicate but I refuse to Break. I’ll be strong because they are strong for me.

What about you friends? What do you fight for? With all the issues that we battle on a daily basis, what gives you that reason to fight?

Blessings to you all, thank you for reading!

Nicole Cherise ♥️

Where is the love Wednesday: can a person truly be in love with two people or is it in Lust with two people instead?

Hey friends! Happy Hump day!

I want to discuss a topic that I’ve always questioned when I hear people speak about being in love with two people. No, this has never been me. So of course my stance is Not bible nor how things should be. I’m just curious, is it really Love or Lust?

Love… a feeling, an act that is shown in different ways and often communicated amongst many in intimate relationships (in this case romantic ones). Some feel that when you love someone their needs become a priority just as your own.

Lust.. a feeling and an act as well from chemistry between individuals (usually sexual). Some could say when your in Lust with someone it’s solely your needs and wants only.

As a Millennial, I notice that our generation and of course others have a problem with communicating, being vulnerable enough to allow someone to come in our inner circle, trust and wanting committed relationships. There are so many options : remain single, date around, get married, get divorced, remarry etc…

Now, with stating some of the issues that people face in dating/courting, is it possible for someone who has a hard time being vulnerable, to truly be in love with two people? I do believe you can be attracted to two people at the same time and like them for different reasons but Love?

As I said, my feelings are my feelings and not law. What do you guys think? Has this been you? Have you been in love with two people at once? Let me hear your thoughts.

Nicole Cherise ♥️

Peace….. Happiness

So much weighs on our minds.

Too much weighs on our hearts.

For many of us, we have to take everything that we deal with, one day at a time.

All the tasks aren’t getting done due to us being overwhelmed with the many distractions that get in the way.

How do we overcome this? How do we find balance? How do we find happiness? My suggestion is to get Peace first.

Having peace is vital and it can help us see the “BIG” picture clearer. We could possibly find solutions to things that are problematic. With Peace comes Acceptance and Happiness will follow not too far behind. Have you struggled with finding happiness? Do you believe you have peace in your life? I’m working on it and pray to get there one day! I hope the same for you all as well.

Thanks for reading friends,

Nicole Cherise ♥️

My feelings on Colorism amongst Black people.

Happy Monday friends!

Over the weekend, I’ve read articles in regards to colorism amongst Black people. The Light skin vs. Dark skin issues, dating preferences and what is truly considered beauty. Many of us know that for many years there has been a “European” standard, therefore, anything close to resembling that was considered beautiful. Since then, people have become more open-minded about the beauty in darker shades and of those with kinkier hair. We see this in commercials, film and advertisements. However, this tends to still be an issues within our community especially when it comes to dating.

I have no problem with people having a preference of what their type is, just as long as they aren’t putting down people who don’t fit that description. Men and women are able to date whoever they please and I do feel it’s unfair for men to get criticized and women don’t. For example: if a black man prefers light-skinned women or dark-skinned women that shouldn’t be an issue. If he’s not bad mouthing the other group it should be no problem. It is a problem to some women. I wonder if it’s because she might be attracted to him and feels that she was disqualified based on a reason that she has No control over. That woman would go on and call him out and say he’s foul for not liking a group of women. However, women have standards too and some are ridiculous 🤷🏾‍♀️. I know some women who have preference of their men to be: over 6 feet tall, dark and muscular. So that cancels out a shorter, light skin men with a pudge belly, whom could be a really sweet person. But the sistas don’t get called out on that. When a man does let them know how it feels the conversation becomes “different” when it’s truly not.

We also have black people who create a status based on skin tone. Meaning they have associate with certain shades of people so that they can stand out or even feel included. Some people get excited to befriend the woman or man who seems to have it “made” for them. Mind you, that’s a theory that some just put in their own heads.

Hate to write this but this happens even in families. Some relatives are brainwashed and favor certain kids over the next because of their skin tones. I’ve heard stories where BOTH skin tones were ostracized and it’s so wrong. Ignore the family too, they do NOT know better because if they did, we wouldn’t have this discussion. Because let’s face it, some families encourage their children to produce with only certain type of people or skin tones.

Now this post isn’t to make anyone in the black community feel bad. I actually want you to you to take this and do the opposite. I want you to love the skin that you were blessed with! If You meet a woman/man who has a different preference than how you appear, that’s ok wish them well and on to the next one. Don’t get bitter, aim for Better. Love your skin, your features, your hair, God blessed you with it and KNOW that you are amazing! Ignore the insults because at the end of the day, it’s their lost.

Thoughts? Have you felt like this? Let me know below in the comments!

Thanks for reading!

Nicole Cherise♥️

Comparison, a possible tool

Good day friends!

I’m sure most of us has heard the quote by Theodore Roosevelt “Comparison is the Thief of Joy“. Which basically says that if we keep looking at other’s lives, we will ultimately become unhappy of our own. I have so many views on this and I’m sure this is often a topic of discussion amongst people. We can be hypocrites on a topic which imo is Normal.

Yes, if you try to keep up with the Jones’, you will get frustrated if your expectations aren’t met. However, using the Jones’ as a tool could benefit you. Seeing the surface, the glitter, the green grass can be flipped for us to figure out how we can achieve that status on our own.

Some of the ways that we compare ourselves are by our appearance, lifestyle, cars, career choices and more. When we see others living the “Life” that we want, many start to believe that they aren’t adequate. Our bodies aren’t good enough, the nice apartment we have is no longer cool, our car isn’t great anymore, all because we are comparing it to the “ideal”.

We should take the initiative to find ways to be the “challenge”. That “ideal” becomes our goal and we can put our own spin on it. Want a healthier and better body? Get to work. Want to go on extravagant vacations every season? Get more sources of income. Keep grinding to get your dream house and luxury car.

All these things are great and achievable. However, do not Lose yourself. You have to love YOU and be proud of the accomplishments that you have made. Keep your eye on the prize and watch the benefits come!

What are your thoughts? Do you compare yourself with others? Have you made the decision to use that as a tool? Let me know ☺️

Thanks for reading!

Nicole Cherise ♥️

Pointing at them is easy

If we all sat down together, you would hear many stories of triumphs and trials. We would discuss love and hate that we receive from others. We also could discuss our setbacks and who is the blame. How many can point at them self and say “I’m the issue too”?

With our failures and shortcomings, it’s so easy to point the finger and blame others. Many of us don’t take accountability for our part in any of our issues. When this happens, we are pretending to be perfect and act as if we are not human. We are bound to mess up, we will disappoint everyone including Ourselves.

Let’s be accountable for our words and actions. Recognize the faults they we have made. Then Learn and grow from it. After a while, if you continue to run into the same type of situations, no one will believe your “poor me” attitude or monologue. Remember friends, love and respect starts from within.

Thanks for reading!

Nicole Cherise ♥️