Hey great people,
Happy Monday to you! After having a conversation with the hubby, I’ve been really considering my position in life currently. Like you, I too, have many hopes and ambition. I catch myself saying “32 is around the corner”, constantly. I’m also thinking, “age is a number” the value of knowledge to gain is more important.
So, “age is a state of mind baby” will be my go to Motto. Lol. As long as we are given another chance at life, we have time to grow and improve.
Take care peeps! Thanks for reading
Nicole Cherise ❤️
Hi friends! Happy Monday and new week to you!
The link above is video shared my Idris Elba. He asks people the question, “what do you want to be when you grow up?” of course, many laughed and states that they were grown up, however when do you stop growing? 🤔
We all have had dreams or goals we want to do, but we reach a point where we just put that dream on the back burner. Is it because it didn’t happen by the age we wanted it to? Did “life” happen? I’ll be first to admit that when I was younger, I wanted to become a wife, mother and Psychologist. Professionally, I want to obtain my doctorate degree and I wanted to open a family center to help all people. I feel like once I was diagnosed with MS that was a curve ball that wasn’t expected. I began to concentrate on other things that were more important, family. Steve and I got married and we eventually became parents. So, I’ve achieved two things, but I still haven’t accomplished the final piece. Once I stopped putting age limits on stuff my mind changed. Once I said I don’t know if it will happen, now it’s I WILL get my cherry on top, God willing.
We also have this attitude that if we don’t do certain things by certain ages, we either failed or will never accomplish them. I feel a lot of television and fairy tales are the cause for this. We have this thought that by this age, I should finish school, I should be in my dream career by that time, this age, I should get married or at least fall in love, I should have kids by this time in life, I should own a home/condo at this point. We place pressure on ourselves and it hurts when these things aren’t fulfilled.
Imagine if we as a people could just live. Imagine as we are growing and evolving, we can say I’m ready to take the leap. Instead of family and society filling our heads with time limits, we take our time and just worry about ourselves and our creations. This can be us friends, we need to make that choice.
What are your thoughts? Thanks so much for reading!
This seems to be a topic amongst people 30+ who aren’t married, single parents or recent unfortunate break ups. It truly breaks my heart when I hear people say these things, especially when they have so much to offer. After going through a break up or if you are currently in a “dead-in” relationship, that doesn’t mean that no one would want you or you are doomed to be single forever. It simply means that you and the ex are not a good pair. He or she is Not the person you should continue to put in the hard work for especially if they aren’t working hard or decided to call it quits.
During a break up, I encourage others to do some soul searching and to reevaluate themselves. Look back at things that went wrong. Do you see how certain situations could have been prevented? Can you own up to Your part of why things went sour? Have you learned more about yourself after the storm has calmed? In a relationship, you are not set to be changed or to change the person you are with and to “create” the perfect person. You are meant to have growth and to inspire one another. If you constantly try to force them to be something they are not and vice versa, you are already headed for disaster. Next time go for who Exactly you want.
So the “love of your life” doesn’t love you anymore and now you feel unlovable. Please don’t feel that way. You are able to love and receive it, just be careful who you allow to come in your most vulnerable place. You said that you have a child and who is going to want you? A person possibly with the same dynamic or someone who Will love you and your child(s). A child is a blessing, and someone with a genuine heart can see first hand how you can love someone else other than yourself. They will truly appreciate you and respect you for being a great parent and could also accept the hold as their own. Lastly, age… Since when is it ok to put a deadline on love? That’s possibly one of Your issues you need to battle. Our generation wants things so quickly and for what? The title? The status? I don’t know, but like anything else, it comes with dedication and hard work. So what if you are 30+ and still single, have you thought to yourself, what a wife or husband should be and if you are all around ready? People love the idea of marriage because of the “dream” wedding, but the substance that comes after is key. If you are selfish in many different aspects of life, I’m sorry, but that can’t fly in a marriage. Therefore, while we focus on age, we really should focus on the maturity that’s needed for marriage.
If any of these things apply to you, I pray that my words can bring some relief. I’m here if you need me.
I’ve been discussing with my DH(darling husband) should age be a reason to base your decisions in your love life?
On this topic, I can see both perspectives.
On one hand, things should not be rushed and relationships should naturally grow. A lot of times people meet and had no idea that they would be the committed couple that they are today. A friendship grew and blossomed into something beautiful, love.
On the other hand, I can see some who feel that their life is drastically changing. Meaning, their friends are starting families of their own, with time family dynamics change (parents getting older) and that fear of being lonely.
Should your age set the time that you should start a family? Not necessarily but for some, they may feel that they don’t have a choice.
What are your thoughts?