Tag: women

Hun, don’t forget you’re human

The saying “Being Strong is the only option” is a True inspirational statement. However, I believe we need to add: “but don’t forget that you are human”. Many of us are raised by people that we see as strong and they taught us to keep it together when trying times come.

We aren’t always advised to cry it out, or to seek therapy because society associates those things as a sign of weakness. The reality is, society does not want us to be Vulnerable. The interesting thing is that being vulnerable comes from our inner emotions…. Emotions something we are born with.

From birth we learn to cry to get the attention of our caregiver. When we feel uncomfortable or scared we seek protection from our caregiver (you can check out Bowlby’s development theory for that). Why does that change as we grow? As stated previously, as we grow our caregivers want us to be strong and I believe it’s because we won’t always have them to protect us from this world.

As a woman, I can say this IS a struggle for me daily. I’m sensitive, empathetic, prideful and strong, but I get overwhelmed because I want to do everything and be everything for everyone. I want to be Wonder Woman for my family, but often I fall apart. Wearing so many hats and masks does take a toll on our mental well-being but yet it doesn’t matter until we have a breakdown.

I’m learning that it’s ok to NOT be ok and It’s ok to voice that. We are wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, grand daughters, cousins, teachers, nurses, lawyers, ministers all in one and so many depend on us to be that for them. These same people need to understand that we Are Human too. For many of them, this won’t be easy for them to understand, but it’s vital that you make them understand your needs.

Ladies, I hope this resonates you to acknowledge that it’s ok to need a “time out”. You are human, and deserve to receive the love and support that you desire. Hold on, don’t give up.

Thank you for reading!

Nicole Cherise ♥️

Men and women are visual but in different ways

Happy where is the love Wednesday folks! 

It amazes me all the time the differences between men and women. One thing we all have in common is wanting to be respected, feel loved and be IN love as well. However, besides those feelings of butterflies, we also visualize things differently.
After conversations with my DH, reading online post, I’ve learned that men are logical thinkers and big on visuals especially when it comes to their mate. I’ve noticed that one of their biggest fears is their significant other “letting themselves go”. Some men do hold their significant other as a “trophy”, so appearance in that sense is very important. 
Now women, in my opinion, we are visual in regards to our mate’s actions. For example, if in the early stages of the relationship, you took us out on dates, gave flowers, cards and confessed how much we mean to you, intellectual conversations etc. and then it just slowly but surely Stops…. Yeah, that’s a problem. Actions speak louder than words, so it’s a turn off when this stops for us women. 
I guess in both men and women, we fear the “comfortable or laziness” that our mate can enable over time. I think the best way to stay on track is to be HONEST. Communicate with each other and be able to accept what is said. If your mate truly loves you and wants you to work out more, spend more quality time, look presentable or show that you still have butterflies, then try to do that. 
Thoughts? Thanks for reading!
** these are one aspect of a relationship not all***
Nicole Cherise ❤️

They say let him be a man, then let her be a woman too!

Through out my life I’ve heard many people say “you have let a man be a man”. Now, what does this mean? 

  1. Let him have his male ego. Let him be “macho” or feel like it at least.
  2. When he needs his time, let him do so with the guys, blah blah blah
  3. Let him have responsibility and take control of some situations. 

Do I agree with all the statements above? No, however, I would never disrespect a man’s manhood and I give respect especially when it is returned. 

Now what about women? Does anyone ever say “you have to let her be a woman?” Nope, at least I’ve never heard it before. As a woman, I consider my self intelligent, loving, sensitive, emotional, nurturing, supportive, just to name a few traits. So if I had to give a few suggestions of “let her be a woman” it would be ( my words are not law, so ladies feel free to chime in )

  1. Let a woman vent even if  you think it’s petty or “not that serious”. More than likely we like who we are sharing our thoughts with so just listen.
  2. Don’t make us feel like our feelings don’t matter. Even the roughest/toughest women out there, still have feelings. Don’t laugh at us or place our feelings on a back burner, just because you feel that you would never take whatever we are upset about to the heart. 
  3. Don’t take our love or how we give our love for granted. There is nothing more hurtful than when you give you’re all to your significant other and it’s ignored. 

We are all beautiful creatures and need to be respectful to one another. I must say I am proud to be a woman, so let me be! Lol 🙂 

This topic has been weighing on my mind a lot and since today is “where is the love” Wednesday, I figured why not post it here today? Thanks for reading. If u have any suggestions or would like to chime in please do in the comments section. Thanks guys!!!

-Nicole Cherise 

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